a tale of Joel

thoughtful

2006-11-21T19:37:00.000+08:00

these days have been good for me...
or bad for me. depending on my perspective of my situation.

currently, at the moment, life is treating me like shit, but i foresee better days ahead. so... its alright. i believe that if one can endure shit, he will live to see better days.

anyways... everything is good. life is treating me just fine. my girlfriend is really great ( i just wish she would be more encouraging instead of pushing me below my spirits all the time. it gets really depressing at times.)

well, meeting Shirly Joseph at the cafe on thursday. thats the day me n her are going to vivo city to catch a movie.

hmm... i wonder how her haircut looks like... (i bet she's hot) XD

longer and shorter days

2006-11-19T00:33:00.000+08:00

days... seem to past so quickly...

after starting work at G2000 tampines, ladies. i feel more alive each day, yet more dead each day. its like being alive, yet being dead at the same time. alive in a sense that you know you have a purpose. but dead, in a sense that you're not living the way you really want to.

i wonder if my getting a part time job is a blessing, or not.
right now...i have much projects, but little time. because i have never bothered to manage my time before, as i always had too much. but now with work, i have so little time, so, i am pretty screwed in a sense that i have to learn and adapt pretty quick, or i'll get PWNed.

anyways, school is cool. i am learning more as the days go by. learning some, yet losing more.

the term 'education' baffles me. because... i feel the more a person 'educates' him/herself, the more... less human, they ultimately become.

i don't know. i don't feel very human at the moment.

do you?

job madness

2006-11-06T19:43:00.000+08:00

when one is looking for job, none comes.

when the time comes to stop working, jobs hop in like nobody's business.

so damn sickening.

Lucky Sunday!... or maybe not...

2006-10-30T01:12:00.000+08:00

As the title suggests...'Lucky Sunday!... or maybe not...'

I went for a third interview today... I got the job.I don't know if thats a good or bad thing. Anyways, I'll be working at that particular job starting next sunday. For the rest of this week, i'll be going down to orchard for work.

Tomorrow will be the second day of school... I don't know why, but i am not looking very forward to it.

Haha, now to more interesting things.

well... nothing really interesting in my life right now... i'll update some time soon.

lol~

don't rot on me dear diary, and carry on reading readers!~ =D

first day at second job of my life

2006-10-28T11:38:00.000+08:00

after working for 2 months in an IT retail shop, not a very big one... i changed jobs to a large fashion botique.

deciding not to name it, all i'd say is it is located at meritus mandarin, in orchard. well... after switching jobs, i am upset to say, it isn't much better than my previous job, as currently, i am not allowed to 'chit-chat' with my colleagues, not allowed to carry my wallet and handphone around. i feel so... departed, away from the world.

anyways, at least the music is nice.

the customer flow is madness, and the fitting rooms are always in a mess... as a general helper, my job is basically to tag clothes with their stupid things, and fold clothes and ask customers if they need any help. i feel so limited. as in... i know i can do so much more than this. haha, my mother told me not to care about it. she says, focus on the money, then don't bother about everything else.

i feel... that is quite logical, if you think of it as money as the center of your life. but... if you want meaning in your life, than... that is notquite possible. anyways, i am working in this job, for the challenge of promotion.

hais.... but still, the location is retarded. i hope the other job i applied for calls me soon. i am starting to regret my decision to work 4 times a week in such a faraway from home place.

i miss my darling also. when she's in the east side, and i am in central, i miss her so much. mayb because they always play love songs in that stupid place. RAWR!

Money nonsense

2006-10-19T18:21:00.000+08:00

these days, there has been many issues.
i think... this holiday... is one well spent. i think... i have grown a little bit more mature.

i feel... more composed now, as i am typing these words onto the keys of my laptop.

i wonder... if only life could be more simple. doing what needs to be done. leaving the cares of the future to itself. its a life worth living for. anyways, to the point. :D

a couple of days back, while i was at Esprit, Orchard. I saw this shirt i really liked. My sweetheart said she found it too glaring, as in, the colors were too stunning. I thought i'd look really good in that, but i didn't buy it at that moment because i wanted to hear more opinions first, so yesterday, with one of our old friends and my sweetheart's sister, i bought the shirt, because they gave positive response.

sitting back and reading the above paragraph, i find it so... formal. well, i wonder if its a good entry. it seems to lack emotion.

but then again... how do words carry emotions anyway?

shopping spree

2006-10-16T00:55:00.000+08:00

i've been out shopping.

it's fun. unfortunately, i broke my glasses yesterday night when i accidently sat on them. damn.
i managed to bug a hundred dollars out of my dad, makes me feel a little guilty. ah well... what to do? i was lazy and didnt work that much. hais... i feel like a giant mosquitoe, though the feeling will eventually wear off, it still isnt very nice of me. anyways...

for shopping, i blew $43.45 on a really good looking nike shoes. i kinda bought the wrong size. and also, bought the wrong item, i didnt really need a shoe for water sports. thank god, the guy that sold me the shoe was gracious and he told me that he'll allow me to change the product this one time. so i changed it for a bag and a yoga mat.
XD the funny thing is that i dont learn yoga, yet. haha, ah well, i think i'll go down to the community center nearby to check out their yoga lessons.
and also, i've got to get down to REALLY repair my bicycle. i really really want to cycle more again.
so, with that, i took a walk around city hall. i blew $7.80 on a whopper meal. its ridiculously huge, though not as big as carl's junior, its definately worth the money. stupidly full.

ivan, my old friend, i wonder if i can even go out supper with him anymore. on my way back just now, there was a terrible ache on my chest. at my solar plexus. the pain was sharp and intense, it left as soon as it came. i am sure nothing is wrong with me though. i will live a long life.

in church today, pastor said the only thing a believer has to labor for, is to labor into the rest of God. even though i try, when i confess that i am the righteousness of God, it makes me more worried, so simply saying, the more i confess, the more i worry. i think it is because i lack understanding of the message of grace. ah well, i'll learn. anyways, i wonder if the church accepts students on internship programs. haha~

Crazy Ivan

2006-10-11T04:10:00.000+08:00

MADNESS. INSANITY. RETARDEDNESS.

these words, i use to describe my supper at midnight, on 11th October.
my old dear friend, Ivan, treated me to supper. the amount we ate, was ridiculous. so much.
allow me to list what we ate.

1 bowl of ban mian. (a type of noodles in soup)
4 fried buns.
drank 60% of a 1.5litre green tea bottle.[maybe more]

i felt so full. damn. i even had trouble walking. never, no more, am i eating so much again. its retarded.

dear dorothy also chatted with me. she asked about my opinion on a subject. i told her my views, and she seemed to agree with me. i am glad. however, i wish i could be more like her. she's such a strong girl. even though my views are right, i can't seem to do the right thing. i feel so hopeless. but, thats how people become stronger. i'll become an even stronger person because of my adversities.

thats right, through trials, one can only get stronger.

the cleansing

2006-10-09T20:34:00.000+08:00

the CLEANSING of my waderobe has begun.

today, i took aside all my oversized formal shirts, and realised, ALL of my formal shirts are oversized.

haha, well... i got rid of the singlets n shirts i NEVER wear also. i had no idea i had so much junk in my waderobe.

and next to be sorted, would b my long sleeve shirts. i have no need for so many, and most of them are oversized too.

i found this really nice shirt in my cudboard, i am wearing it now. i look like some kind of army escapee in this outfit. LOL

i like it.

well... for more, i've been shopping, and i found that beach wear are very nice. i like them a lot, but they are way too informal to go out in, and, they are damn expensive too. actually, not for a working adult, but... for a normal student, yeah, its expensive.

a day out, without smiles

2006-10-04T23:46:00.000+08:00

i met with jeffrey and keekit at 5pm.
we went to bedok, then to semei. at semei, we went to play pool. it was on keekit's tab, so i couldn't care any less.
later zi ting came at 8+. we were supposed to meet at 7.

so... never mind. i finally see some of them again. however, i didnt see the ones i missed. such were dorothy, clarence.

also, jeffrey mentioned about beaches... alas... work. money.
damn those 2 words.

working for fulfilment... seems to be a far fetched ideal these days...
time seems to pass so slowly at work.

time

2006-10-02T12:55:00.000+08:00

these days... i think after requesting to work only 2 days a week.

anyways, at work, a lot of time spent slacking.
there was this customer who was looking for heat-sensing paper. i was dumbfounded. shocked. where in the world is there such a thing as heat sensing paper?!
i smiled and told the customer we didn't sell it here. (altho i dont think its sold anywhere else... i told him to try challenger) who knows? mayb they sell it there. haha.

i've got too much time.

yesterday, i went with darling to bugis, while she went to work, i went to church with my brothers, after which, we went to long john silvers to have our dinner. and they insisted that it was on me. damn, it wasn't cheap, considering the amount i work, anyways, saw a lot of niceties at city hall, however, most of them are all luxury items, not things i really need. and then, later in the evening, went with ivan to marina square, the creative shop there supposedly had a sale, and i wanted an MP3 player, so we went to take a look see. it turns out that they had sales mainly for mp3 players and video stuff, so, not much things for ivan to see. i almost felt bad at asking him if he wanted to come.

anyways, life has got interesting, many things await in the future. though the skies seem bleak now, God has promised for a better tomorrow. the bible says "the path of the righteous can only get brighter"

time to go now. will update when more interesting things happen.

eventful days... or maybe not

2006-09-25T16:46:00.000+08:00

well... these past few days have been uneventful.
but there were many thoughts.

thoughts such as my key values, dreams, ambition and friends.

i want to be a successful person. so... my defination of success is being happy. and, happiness comes from contentment. so... actually, what i really need is to be content? i am not sure. because i once read a book which says, contentment leads to laziness and the stop of improvement. so... i've rarely let myself be content the past months. however,in the past few days, during my off days, i find that contentment brings forth joy and peace. and instead of actually being bad tempered like i usually am, i am slightly more mild.

this is interesting no?

anyways, watched the korean drama full house. nice show. i like it a lot. i wonder of you-tube shows it. i want to watch it. :lol: anyways, my parents ask me, "since when did you start to like watching chinese dramas?" i replied," firstly, this isn't chinese. its a korean drama. and second, i started liking it when i first watched it. whats the matter?" they didnt reply. mayb they were shocked. haha. ever since primary six, i have been against studying mandarin, unless the teacher was nice. anyways, my parents also said only girls watch TV dramas. Now, i find that absurd. whats wrong with guys liking to watch dramas? i think my parents are a bit outdated... but... nevermind. i told them, if they don't listen... den... i'll just continue watching.

ah... my pay should b coming in soon. sadness. i need $cha-ching!$ lol. i am flat for this month. the job is fun, if i work only 2-3 times a week. too frequent, i'll get damn sick of it. 2 days a week, is good enough. i don't need that much money, just enough will do. heck. i need to stock my wadrobe. its FILLED with OVERSIZED clothes! except for a couple, which my sweetheart bought for me, and a some which i chose with my mother.

hmmm... anyone knows anywhere thats good to shop? lol.

the next entry shall b called: THE REVIEW! (of shopping places joel has been to) =P

Finally!

2006-09-22T15:26:00.000+08:00

At long last, i've finally cut down the list of jobs, to what i really want.

to be an interior designer. now, what worries me is that is there a demand? because no one can claim to be the best in the market, because there is always someone bester than the best. so... yeah.

also, i've also decided to start working only on weekends. because... my girlfriend is only free on CERTAIN weekdays, and her week ends are most surely burnt. i don't want for the both of us to be exhausted. i want to b stronger, for both me and her. she's the only other reason why i am living. well... it can be said she IS the most important reason. well... then on the other hand... haha, lets not talk about the other hand. she is the most precious person to me.

well... all that aside, i was supposed to work today. but i was feeling stupid, because my current job is NOTHING like what i really want to do, so... i was thinking of switching the timing to less frequent... sure, i'll earn much less, but, i can spend my time doing more constructive stuff. like learning more interior designing, the various aspects, the different kind of clients, the different kind of styles, mood colors, particular seasons etc. etc. just thinking about it gets me excited. maybe its because i've never done something like it before.

oh... yeah, victor aka archfreak created a deviantart.com. the url is http://archfreak.deviantart.com, go check it out, he has some black n white photos. very nice. but, still a bit naked. just browse around. plenty of talented (AND untalented people) there. well... just look. no harm done.

cheers~

New Blog

2006-09-20T08:36:00.000+08:00

Well...
Dear Blog,
the blogger has decided to create a new blog, because he felt the old blog contained too much emo -things. well...
its true, but, lets make life more interesting from now on okay?
its about time a change of mindset took place. the male understands this point and is going to make september 20, a special day to remember.

remember,remember september 20.

lol. not at all like v.